by Gloria Furman - May 18, 2012
(Gloria
Furman lives in Dubai with her husband Dave, a pastor. They are raising
three young kids. Gloria is currently writing a book for Crossway on
applying the gospel in the home)
I live in a culture that admires a man’s earning power, and his fertility, and his ability to rule his domain with an iron fist.
While
Scripture certainly calls for a Christ-like masculinity that provides
for and protects his family, the Bible takes a wrecking ball to the
culture-based ideals of masculinity that are celebrated around the
world.
By
God’s grace, I enjoy the fruits of living with a man who demonstrates
biblical masculinity. This is the kind of masculinity that emerges from
the gospel, points back to the gospel, and celebrates the gospel in my
home.
Unashamed
The
masculinity I appreciate as a wife is of far greater value than
wealth-earning power. It’s a masculinity that is unashamed of the gospel
which is the power of God (Romans 1:16).
The
unashamed masculinity I enjoy in my home leaves a legacy that is more
enduring than prolific fertility. It’s masculinity that fervently loves
others from a heart that has been born again, born not of seed which is
perishable, but imperishable. True masculinity is reborn through the
living and abiding word of God.
The
unashamed masculinity I love to follow in my home is far more
impressive than macho pride. It’s masculinity that is willing to take
the painful shrapnel in the battle against his own sin, rather than run
from sin and hide in the comfort of silence. It is a masculinity that
willingly exposes its life to the iron-sharpening-iron of open and
honest male accountability relationships.
The
unashamed masculinity that guards the hearts in my home puts away rash,
cutting words that pierce like a sword. My husband’s Christ-honoring
masculinity understands the power of words, and he uses words to bring
healing to me and our children.
The
unashamed masculinity I cherish in my home is such that fixes its eyes
on Jesus and turns its eyes away from all the vain things of this world
that hold a potent charm over other men. My husband’s Christ-honoring
masculinity flees from promises whispered by a hiss.
The
unashamed masculinity I need in my home is concerned that others find
their delight in God. Nothing quite says, “I love you” to me than when
my husband is willing to humbly stand up to the things I pursue that
obstruct my everlasting joy in God. His loving masculinity reassures me
of Christ’s atonement made on my behalf, and of the privilege I have to
boldly approach the throne of grace.
Unashamed
masculinity has less to do with how many horses a man owns, or how fast
he can run. Unashamed masculinity is about what a man does with the
gospel.
Where
can you see this unashamed masculinity? You see it whenever a man has
peered into the empty tomb and found new motivation to lay down his own
life to spread the gospel into the souqs of Casablanca, into the office
spaces in Dallas, into the cafes in Geneva, into the shantytowns of
Mumbai, into the barrios of Sao Paulo, and into the universities of
Toronto.
My Unashamed Husband
My
dear, godly, husband once explained to someone that he wasn’t able to
shake hands because of the nerve disease in his arms. This person said,
“That’s awful! Everyone can tell a real man by the firm grip of his
handshake.”
I just smiled to myself.
I’ve
watched my husband find his strength in the joy of the Lord. He has a
firm grip on grace. And I can testify that he is “a real man” by his
unashamed passion for the gospel.
When
he cares for our family, our church, and our city with the gospel, he
grabs hold of the gates of hell and shakes them without fear and without
shame.
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